it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
