So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
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