____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Randomize
