she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize