i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
