Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
