But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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