I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
