Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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