You're earring is so big in my mouth
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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