First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
