A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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