That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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