May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
