He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize