can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
