Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize
