What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
