with your own penis?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
