After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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