She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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