I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i wish my penis had a tongue
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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