hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
he laminated a picture of his dick.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize
