brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
