she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
