I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
