I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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