In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
