Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
