Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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