This is not my ceiling
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Randomize
