you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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