you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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