The maid of honor just puked.
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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