You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
