I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
