Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
