He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
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