Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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