So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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