so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
