i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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