me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
