Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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