she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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