Walk of Shame. In a state park.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
