Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
