I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
