Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize