I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
