Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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